Monday, October 25, 2010

Grilled Cheese Shame Spiral

It's fall and time for comfort foods that follow the rhythm of the season.
Apple crisp, sweet potatoes, hearty soups.

Or not.
My hankering is for grilled cheese. Not whole wheat bread with Tillamook.
I want to embrace fall with highly processed food. American cheese.

My grocery store's cheese selection was clearly too high-minded and healthy for this craving.*
*Please know I am not exaggerating about the cheese selection. I haven't had to investigate alternative cheeses for several years. 
Production has obviously been stepped up.

Time to get down and dirty. I know who can sell me what I need.
The liquor store. 

I have to ask for it with other refrigerated food behind the counter.

shame spiral rating is at 5, because I'm grocery shopping at liquor store

He tells me the cheese has an expiration date of two weeks ago.

shame spiral rating is at 6, because this is why I shouldn't be grocery shopping at liquor store
He'll give me the cheese, if I want it. I didn't even feign indecision for the people in line behind me.I feel giddy that I will get this American cheese for free.  Don't hate.**

shame spiral rating = 8. I am not only going to eat this expired cheese but I feel like I just won the American cheese lottery
**I am not super squeamish. But this isn't even real food. I'm pretty sure that the expiration date is just for show. 

How was it? Effing delicious.

I ate three grilled cheese sandwiches that day and finished the pack soon thereafter. (Did you realize you don't even have to dirty a knife? It's all sliced for you).

And I don't think there were any ill effects.

Except that it took me two weeks to think of my next drawing post (and it's about grilled cheese).


Christine said...

Best. Comic. Ever! The diagonal cut line is just priceless.

Anonymous said...

What a powerful juxtaposition between gut wrenching sadness and belly button popping hysterical humor. Who hasn't been on that shame spiral with you?

Sarah Overman said...

Yes, this one has me giggling and uncomfortable at the same time...

tamdini said...


mollyanna said...

I kind of feel that the shame level should have been lowered a couple of notches by bucking the FDA expiration guidelines. Love this!

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